October 21, 2012

31 Days of Creative Homemaking :: Day 21--Sharing Household Duties

Enduring some household duties...and getting drywall in the face.

When it comes to sharing household duties with a partner or spouse, every relationship is different and every work and home situation is as well. There is no one right way but today I wanted to share with you how things work for us.

Because I am at home and my husband works full time, I take care of the majority of household duties. Part of it is because I am controlling and want to take care of these things for him and for myself (anyone relate!?). Though the things I do not enjoy doing that many men do (like take out the trash) I choose to do to serve my husband and so that it is taken care of so when he gets home so we can relax.

I have learned that in order to have the home what I want I need to not nag my husband for things that I can do on my own. Extra things like painting walls, planting flowers, hanging things on the wall...all things that I want...not really needs...I do myself so that he does not feel overwhelmed by additional work to do when he gets home.


By doing most things on my own (because I have the time and desire) allows me to save my husband for things I cannot do alone.  Things like put up a fence or rewiring a chandelier in our backyard are things I cannot do and should not do (for my own safety probably!).  I am a dreamer and my husband is realistic.  We are constantly finding a balance when it comes to what I dream for our home and what is actually realistic.  Thankfully I married a patient husband!

Every man is different, but by not asking my husband too much when it comes to my projects allows me actually to do all of these projects.  Sometimes I am already walking on eggshells with projects (what, you painted our dining room for the 3rd time this year?!).  I want to respect and honor my husband and I know that he wants me to be a happy wife in a pretty home.  Our compromise is that I am willing to move heavy furniture and learn how to use a drill properly.


The same goes for cleaning and basic upkeep of our house.  Because I am home, I should have time to take care of the laundry and the dishes.  But my husband also knows that I watch my nephew, blog, edit our wedding photography, spend time with friends, and go to the gym.  He knows that these are all for my well being, happiness, health, and purpose.  If the house is not always clean, he shows me grace because we both know that making time for people and what life throws at us is more important than having the house clean all of the time.

I do not stay home to have a clean house.  Rather I am at home so that I can be available to my husband, family, future children, friends, and unique opportunities like hanging out with you awesome blog readers!  And my husband works hard and we balance our finances so that I can be at home.  And because of that I will always clean the toilet for him.  It's the least I can do.

So now I want to hear your story!  How do you balance household duties in your home while still getting along with the people who live in it!?


Check out all posts from the 31 Days of Creative Homemaking Series here.

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31 Days of Creative Homemaking for the Modern Day Woman is now available as an ebook!  Click here to find out more about this entire series in an easy to read PDF download!


5 comments:

  1. Great post! I always love reading how different couples choose to divvy up their work. When I'm out of school, I take care of all housework, but when I'm in school I do laundry, cook, and clean kitchen and bathroom. He has quite a few days off, so he takes care of everything else. He is pretty domestic, so I actually have to fight for a chance to do anything. As far as projects go, he prefers to do them as well. I'm pretty blessed with a guy who likes to keep everything clean & neat.

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  2. Like you, I'm at home full time so I take on the majority of household responsibilities. Essentially I do most of what takes place inside the house and my husband does most of the outside work (trash, yardwork, repairs). Since he works pretty long hours and has a lot of responsibility at work, I try to keep the home-related stress to a minimum. It doesn't always work out that way but I do my best ;) My husband is great about taking on jobs when I need him to or taking care of the kids so I can get away or sleep in so it feels like a good tradeoff to me. Great post!

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  3. You are such a good wife! It's about 50/50 at our house since we both work away from home. We are also partners in parenting so we both give 110% to make our home happy! He does, however, do ALL of the cooking and I feel sooo blessed!

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  4. We split our duties so that he does most of the yardwork (with the exception of my "garden") and I do most of the inside work. He will occasionally cook breakfast for the kids or do dishes, and I'll occasionally sweep out the garage or vacuum out the van...so we try to help each other out a bit. I do most of the decorating inside, but have not braved the drill yet...so if it's curtains or shelves, it's up to him, but I can handle little stuff that just needs a nail. Great post...I'm really enjoying your series!

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  5. My husband and I kind of do the same thing. I work part-time and stay at home the rest of the time taking care of the home, making dinner, cleaning, laundry and other things that are small enough for me to do. Like you, I leave the things that require some skill... using a table saw, electrical issues and cutting wood.( we use a wood stove ) but I can bring the wood in and make sure the fire is going when he gets home and have a cup of tea for him. I am appreciative that I am able to stay home and take care of my husband and my home!!

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