31 Days of Creative Homemaking :: Day 23--Things I Do For My Husband

Preparing for my husband to come home

One of my goals as a wife and homemaker is to make our home a welcoming place for my husband to come home to.  I do not always get this right...there have been many times that he has walked into the middle of one of my never ending "projects" and was not happy about it.  But for the most part, I try my best to prepare our home for his homecoming so that he looks forward to coming home after a long day of work.  Here are just a few of the things we do for each other that helps us have a good relationship:

THINGS TO DO TO PREPARE FOR HIS HOMECOMING

1. Pick up the house.

2. Get dinner started.

3. Lay out his after work comfy clothes and sometimes accompanied by some chocolate when I know he had a rough day (I don't do this regularly--maybe once every few months).

4. Make sure he has clean laundry for the next day.

5. Occasional fresh baked cookies especially on days I know that were long for him.

6.Allow him to immediately sit on the couch when he needs to and watch TV.  This is his outlet for him and sometimes he needs some time to unwind before chatting it up with me.  If I have had a hard or stressful day he is good about stopping and listening.

7. When I have my nephew, be extra excited that Uncle Brent is home and meet him with big smiles at the door. 

8. Greet him at the door...not with my back to the computer screen!  I have to work on this one too!


THINGS I DO FOR MYSELF--BUT FOR HIM

1. Light candles to create warmth--my husband is not one to be super aware of ambiance but I find when I can put myself in the homemaking mood by lighting candles and whatnot, it puts me in the mindset of preparing our home for his homecoming.

2. Clean clothes or pajamas--sometimes I put off showering from a morning workout and so I try to shower and change before he gets home so that I am ready to hang out with him.

3. Plan intimacy--decide it I am going to initiate and make it a priority by giving him special attention early on.

OTHER THINGS I DO FOR HIM

1. Pack his lunch every night for the next day--this is usually a sandwich or leftovers, granola bar, crackers, and fruit or veggies.  It is a consistent mix of healthy, high fiber/protein, and sometimes a sweet treat.

2. Go through the mail, pay bills, any extra things that I am capable of doing myself so he doesn't have to remember.

3. Plan our calendar--email him dates at work so he knows what is going on, plan social engagements, organize family get togethers. 

4. Send treats with him to work to share with his coworkers.

5. Pray for him in the mornings for his day at work.


THINGS HE DOES FOR ME

 1. Kiss me good bye every morning even if I am still sleeping--I have some issues with closure and so having him say good bye to me fills my cup even if I don't always remember he did it!

2. He is always willing to pick up last minute groceries for me on his way home from work.

3. Mows the lawn and always makes sure to do so before we have company coming over.

4. Cards on special occasions--my love language is words so he always makes sure to get me a card...and I make sure he doesn't forget with friendly reminders!

// What things do you do for your spouse/partner/kids/family that welcomes them home after a long day?  Tomorrow I will be sharing some of my favorite books on marriage!


Check out all posts from the 31 Days of Creative Homemaking Series here.

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31 Days of Creative Homemaking for the Modern Day Woman is now available as an ebook!  Click here to find out more about this entire series in an easy to read PDF download!


20 comments:

  1. What a great list! I can't wait for the day when I have a husband to prepare a home for.

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  2. Thanks for this post! After 22 years of marriage, I am finally learning how to love my hubby like he needs and he treats me like a queen. I love to have his meals cooked and waiting for him. I lay his clothes out for work every morning. I have the house straightened up and usually try to wear clothes that are appealing to him. He takes care of issues around the house and car, goes shopping with me and takes me on a date once a week. And I always make sure to ask him Is there anything I can do to make his day better.
    There is nothing better than knowing your mate wants to come home to you. :)

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  3. Great post. I think it is so important for us wives to think about these things. We have been married 25 1/2 years and I still try to do the things you have suggested. We need to let our husbands know how much we love and appreciate them. Keep up the great work. Hugs, Bobbi Jo

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    1. Thank you! We have only been married three years and I notice myself forgetting some of those things I used to be so much better at! I want to constantly be reminding myself so that I do not loose touch on the importance of our relationship!

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  4. This is so awesome Ashley!!! I do a lot of the things you do! And now that I took a full time job I am constantly praying that God gives me the hability to do it with joy- so far so good! My husband works sometimes 12-13 hours a day so I know I have to be strong for him. I light candles too, I let him unwind the way he likes it, dinner, pack lunch, most of the thing you said. And he has been great help too if I need little things done after a long day. God has been good to me to give me a job where I don't stress and have some down time so when I get home my mind is not as charged and I can do almost everything! (Almost, I am not perfect!). It's funny what you say about intimacy and about initiating it; sometimes I'd get frustrated that my husband wouldn't initiate it but he does appreciate when I do, so I continue to do it :) I guess it has to do with being tired. Something I also do for my hubby, that I can do more often, is offer him a back massage :)

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  5. you two are so cute!! i love all the suggestions you wrote here. i definitely learned to greet my husband when he gets home form work, my mom always did and she would drop anything she was doing to greet him so show him how important he is to her. i think for new wives knowing not to smother your husband or pepper him with questions after you greet him once he walks in the door should be taught early on later than learned later! i am loving this series!

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    1. Thank you Meg! I think what you mentioned about how your mom modeled it for you is also a great lesson to children that dad is important to mom! Something I want to remember when I have my own kids one day!

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  6. I LOVE this post! And these are great tips for me to remember. I'm pretty bad about giving Shawn the look (it's been an exhausting please save me look) when he gets home. But I do love it when he is home, I need to show it more :-)
    xo

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  7. This is one of my favorite quotes, and one I strive to live. Thanks for a great list of reminders. I've been working at making sure the kitchen is straightened up, and the counters clean, because it makes me less stressed, which makes me a happier wife, who is happy to see my husband.

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  8. In a world that praises a regular job, it is so important to remember that having a good relationship takes effort.My Hubs loves cards, so I make sure I leave random ones for no reason.He gets me my favorite candy bar and puts it in the fridge 'cause he know I like it cold. I set the table and serve my Hubs (something I am criticized for) Yes, he can serve himself, but I like doing it and he appreciates this effort.
    I am so putting this post on my bookmark!

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  9. Ashley, do you still work outside of the home from time to time? If so, how does it effect this list? That is what I struggle with as a wife who works 50+ hours a week.

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    1. I no longer work outside of the home like I used to but I can say that not everyday do I have the energy or even the willing spirit that I would love to have all the time. I find that sometimes it is the littlest things, like welcoming him home that matter more than a home cooked meal. It's about finding a balance that works for every individual family situation! You are a wonderful wife and mom and I hope you find that balance! xo

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  10. Ashley, do you still work outside of the home from time to time? If so, how does it effect this list? That is what I struggle with as a wife who works 50+ hours a week.

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  11. How special!!! I love reading the things that you do for one another. Being married takes lots of work every single day. Thank you for the reminders to be off the computer and greet my hubby at the door. I'm going to work on that!!

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  12. My husband once told me that he read an article that described how many words the average man or woman is capable of using each day. Obviously the female capacity is higher- we are more chatty by nature I guess :) The point of the article was that once you've used up your words for the day, it is physically taxing to have to continue to talk. He might have been making this up but it makes sense to me, especially when I was working and often spent a lot of time on the phone. The discussion evolved into a code that we use when he gets home from work - if either one of us is feeling worn out and non-chatty, we just tell the other "I used up all my words today." That way the other person doesn't feel like they are getting the cold shoulder or think something is wrong. It's an easy way of saying that the other person shouldn't expect a lot of meaningful conversation but I still love you and am ready to listen :)

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  14. This is something that Matt and I talked about when we were going the pre-marital couseling. We both gave each other a short list of things we needed from each other to feel prized. Of course that list has changed in the 6 years we have been married. I always try to greet him at the door when he comes home and pack his dinner before he leaves for night shift. He is a police officer so one of his big needs is being able to de-stress before coming home to us, so I try not to complain about him going to the gym to blow off steam. The things he sees and deals with on a daily basis, he needs to get out of "cop mode". I serve him his dinner first, even before the children, whether we are at home or at someone elses place. I have had women make negative commments about it but serving is the way i show love.

    My husband is an amazing man in exchange, he runs me a warm bath and offers to take care of bedtime with the littles when he can tell I am frazzled. He will call his mom to come watch the kids so we can have a date night every once in a while. Nearly every weekend he lets me sleep in while he does cartoons and cereal duty. I think it is when couples do these small things to show that they come first (well second after God) that you have a stronger relationship. You remember all of the sweet stuff and it makes it easier to forgive the bumps that are inevitable.

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  15. wow, I wrote a book. :) woopsy!

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