Thankfulness Thursdays Week 8--Thankful for Busy?

Today is week eight of Thankfulness Thursdays where we meet up each week to share what we are thankful for from now until Thanksgiving.  You can write a simple list or focus on writing about one thing you are thankful for.  No rigid rules! 

Also feel free to use the above image in your blog post if you wish!

You can find out more information about the link up


My crazy face.

Today I am choosing to be thankful for being busy.  Yes, you heard me right.  But with a major emphasis on "choosing."

This week I have been looking at my calendar, preparing for my 31 Days Series, getting ready for a wedding and homecoming session this week with Urke Photography, thinking about my upcoming trip to visit my BFF and her new baby in Santa Barbara, our anniversary vacation coming up in a few weeks, having my sister in law stay with us in between these two vacation weeks, planning my husband's birthday, out of town weddings, 60th wedding anniversary celebration...and I haven't even began to wrap my head around the holidays.

The thing is my calendar is filled with a whole lot of wonderful things.  But my little anxious mind is having a whole lot of trouble being okay with it all.  All day yesterday I kept on thinking, why did I commit to this 31 days thing?  Right after I announced it to the whole world?

So I am breathing slowly.  Having a bunch of mental conversations with myself.  I can do this.  I want to do these things.  And it's going to be okay. 

My normal self would usually cry, complain, eat a bag of Dorritos, not make it to the gym, and tell my husband we cannot visit his out of town family.  But maybe for the first time ever, I haven't done any of these things.

Instead I got up, went to the gym, vented to my girlfriend, came home and buckled down for the tasks that needed to be taken care of.  My husband's birthday present is wrapped over a month early.  I am caught up on lingering photos and camera cards are cleared for this weekend.  I have a few 31 Days posts already set to go.  Next weeks posts are scheduled.  Laundry is clean but not put away (does it ever get put away?).  I ate my usual meals and kept to my "you can only eat _____ list so that you feel good in a swimsuit when you go to Puerto Vallarta in a couple of weeks" (And for those of you who are curious, this is not a rigid list but it does not include things like ice cream or chips or things that have a lot of calories but no nutritional value). 

As I thought about all of this I wondered how this fits with my desire to live a simple life.  The next few weeks are not going to be simple but they are going to be doable, manageable, even maybe enjoyable because the rest of our lives we are living simply.  This is not the norm but a season.  Because our regular home life is not adding stress or anxiety, these extra commitments are only temporary.

All this to say, I think I am going to be okay.  And the thing that rattles my mind is that this is so not like me.  In control.  Somewhat calm.  Relying not on my own strength but on thankfulness.

And so this week I am thankful that I am changing.  Growing.  Handling what life throws in my face without freaking out.  Taking care of myself and not letting small doses of minor depression keep me from living life.

When life gets crazy I tend to get sad and depressed.  And though I still may feel very anxious, I am not sad.  And that is a huge step.  So I am thankful.