January 25, 2013
How to Balance Relationships, Loneliness, and Entertaining
The last few weeks I have been spending some time thinking about my emotions, insecurities, and seasons of loneliness as it pertains to entertaining and opening up my home to others. I struggle sometimes with wanting to be social and even being a good friend but despite that I continue to work on stretching myself to welcome people into my life and home.
I know for many people there are plenty of reasons why they fear having people in their home. If you asked my husband, the one person who knows me best, he can attest to the fact that I struggle with social anxiety. A lot.
It may appear that I love to entertain and, perhaps to some, do it flawlessly. But I too struggle with an overly critical heart for myself. My point to this is that if I can make room for people in my home and heart when it is opposite to what I consider safe, you can too, with your own personal quirks and imperfections.
I love creating a pretty home, cooking, and decorating for parties. I love it so much that I allow myself to go through the stress of inviting people, waiting for their RSVP, and then being part of the conversation once they are here.
And the reason I do this is because I wasn't meant to do life alone. Even though I would rather sit at home with my computer, a book, and my pretty decorations I have learned that those things eventually leave me empty. I crave for social interaction and authentic relationships, even if it's hard for me to get there.
So instead I have found what I love, decorating and cooking and doing crafts, and I invite people to come over and enjoy those things with me.
I encourage you, if you are struggling with having people in your home or even perhaps disappointed with your lack of friendships in your life, find something you love--something safe to you--and invite someone to join you. Feed people food, serve others, and give even when you feel like you have nothing left to give. Because eventually one of those people is going to give back and it will be worth all the trouble and work.