We just returned from our five year anniversary trip. Coming back from a two week vacation in Paris, Iceland, and Seattle, for the first time in my home obsessed life, I was sad to come home. We have gone on vacation before, usually for a week or long weekend. This is the longest I have ever been away and it felt different to come home this time around. I did not miss it as much or yearn for it like I usually do. It felt oddly unfamiliar.
Sometimes my husband and I talk about if we ever think we would move. Anything from moving to a different house in the same city to moving out of state. They are never serious conversations and usually my answer is a big fat "NO" because the idea of moving away from my family and familiarity seems unbearable.
Yet coming home this time was different. I missed seeing my friends and family and looked forward to sharing about our adventures with them. But being away with my husband exploring new countries and cities was just the taste of something else that I needed that is helping me let go of something I have always held so tightly to.
I got to experience a life somewhere else and it was more that I could have ever imagined. I know comparing everyday life to vacation is unrealistic. But it made me realize that at the end of the day, as long as I have Brent by my side, we could have a full life anywhere.
And to be completely honest, travel is not always luxurious. Our feet hurt, we got irritated with each other, we got lost, and no matter how many band aids I put on I still got blisters--ones so painful that I cried one night walking back to our room in Paris. But travel changed us in a way that allowed us to see the life that we know in a different element.
We have no plans of moving anytime soon. Or ever. But my obsession with my home and need for familiarity has changed. And I feel grateful for it. I will continue to love my home, taking care of a home, home decor, and using my home as a place to extend love and relationship with others. But I do not want my home to become an idol that perhaps would keep me from experiencing something better out of fear of losing something I love so much.
I was reminded that relationship and experiences are greater than things. As I continue to love on our little home, I hope to be less consumed with it's appearance and instead more focused on letting it serve its purpose as a place to rest my head at the end of the day for a life that is well lived.
"One's destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things."