I knew the word serve would get some heads turning. I knew many women would be cheering me on while others would get offended. Nonetheless, the thing is, it is not so much about the word serve as it is the heart.
I know a lot of women, who because of their faith, believe they are to serve (and submit) to their husbands. The thing is, some of these women are not very nice to their husbands. I know other women who are full on feminists who honor and treat their husbands with the utmost respect but would cringe at the word serve.
Maybe one husband deserves to be served more than the other one does. But if you have any sense of humanity, wouldn't you agree that most people we come in contact with deserve to be served in one way or another? Opening a door for a mom with a stroller, offering an apple to the homeless on the corner, giving up your day off to help a neighbor move? So why is it so hard to wrap our heads around the idea of serving our husbands?
I think the answer is because we don't live with the tired mom with her stroller. We don't have to pick up the homeless man's dirty socks. And we don't have to make dinner for our neighbor while he plops himself in front of the TV day after day.
Believe me, there are many days I do not want to serve my husband. And there are moments in our life that he doesn't deserve it. But the thing is, I don't deserve it either.
But I married this man. Even his dirty socks and wet towel on the floor.
Just like a new mom, homeless person, or neighbor has needs, my husband has needs. And I feel it deep on my heart that when I see a need, if I can, I should fill it.
I can be my husband's biggest support, encourager, and cheerleader. Through my role in his life, I can play a large piece in him being the man he was destined to be. Or I can tear him down, discourage him, or just be a constant nag. *Besides the point, being a nag was never the woman I wanted to be.
I know for some of you the word serve is hard. Like personally, painfully hard. And I want to be gentle and respectful of that. But I also want to challenge that the word serve can be a freeing thing. That we can let go of our selfishness and see this person we chose to spend the rest of our life with in new light. We can be freed from ourselves in a way that allows us to be even greater than we are. To be gracious, loving, kind, serving women that blesses our husbands as well as each person we come in contact with. That we would see people, and our husbands, as humans with stories of pain, frustration, discouragement, and humanness. And we would accept them for who they are.
May we serve not because we have to. But because we want to. That serving is an honor and not a trap. And that serving in turn will incredibly bless our lives and our marriages in ways we never imagined.
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